Blip in Time

This week one of my clients mentioned that it would great to get a graduation cap and gown at the end of our time together. We all laughed. But in reality, its an amazing accomplishment to complete therapy. Therapy is hard work and to trudge through the tough stuff is courageous, brave, and strong.

When I was in grad school one of my professors said, “it’s your job as therapist to put yourself out of business.” Over the years I have thought about this statement many times as therapy ends. And sometimes it seems counterintuitive.

Termination is a fancy word that we in the therapy biz use to mean the end. The end of our time together, the end of our therapeutic relationship, the end of the story for me as a therapist. I only get little blips of time with people, most of the time I get their hardest blip of time to be fair. I get the crisis but I also get the privilege of seeing people move from crisis to health.

Weekly sessions often turn into monthly check ins, followed by the eventual termination of healthier clients. Therapy highlights the strength a person already possesses while also providing tools and strategies to handle life’s stressors in constructive ways. Not that life is easy for any of us.

But a healthy ending can be a corrective emotional experience, meaning we replace a lot of unhealthy endings (break ups, death, divorce, complicated loss etc.) with a positive ending. And that’s part of the process.

One of the greatest gifts a therapist can give a client is the experience. The process of asking for help, doing the therapeutic work with support, and ending successfully is a corrective emotional experience.

So as therapy ends there will be loss. I often find myself wondering about past clients and hoping they are doing well. But there will also be celebration. We will take time to acknowledge progress and appreciate the growth. There will be time to say goodbye in a healthy way. And as life transitions to new seasons, returning to therapy when needs arise is a safe, welcomed, and encouraged idea.